Don’t tell me. I actually don’t want to know. TMI. Sometimes people overshare on social media without even realising it. It’s simply too easy to just post a photo (with or without a caption), tweet your innermost feelings or comment on someone else’s post.
But have you ever considered whether your friends, family, colleagues, followers, or the world (if your profile is public) want to know what your doing/eating/feeling, what your kids are wearing/saying/learning??? I have to admit that I have done this and I have learnt some lessons along the way. Just by talking to people, I’ve learnt that:
- One photo of my son is enough.
- I need to protect my son’s identity from the world (as much as I can). More about this later.
- Only 50% of my followers appreciate #FoodPorn.
This topic will divide you all. You will either agree or disagree.
The point of this is to let you see it from my corner. Put yourself in my shoes for one moment – just for this example. You are a mother of a young boy.
I’m going to use the worst possible situation here for your own sake. Suppose your son later down the track becomes the victim of a pedophile ring. They see his photo on the Internet and one day you find out it was that photo you took at the beach.
How would you feel? Angry. Scared. Disappointed in yourself. And many other emotions I’m sure.
You will possibly start to question your actions. Why did I post that cute photo of him at the beach? It was innocent and you just wanted to capture that moment of his life. It was harmless in your eyes. A cute photo for your friends to see. But what about the rest of the world? Once you put it out there – it’s no longer just yours. You have given every man and his dog permission to use that photo for whatever purpose they like. This is obviously (to me) the worst possible scenario and one I never ever want to experience or wish on anybody. I am simply putting it out there so that we can consider one thing – our actions have consequences. Something I’m teaching my son right now.
And if you have noticed, I have never posted my families names on my blog for this reason – to protect their privacy. I have also never posted their faces. My Instagram is private and I am selective of the people I allow to view them because at one stage (back when I wasn’t thinking straight) I was that mum posting constant photos of my son on Instagram. Now, I don’t want to take the photos off because to me, my Instagram serves 2 purposes.
- To capture my life in photos.
- To record my journey .
My life has been pretty up and down and I want to show these photos to my son when he’s old enough to fully understand. But now I must pick and choose who can view those posts from way back when.
I once asked a group of friends if my posts are OTT. I had some say it’s ok. Some like them and some say, there were a lot of photos of my son. Not necessarily a bad thing, but depending on the people, it may have been too much. And then the other day, someone posted a statement, which was so relevant to this topic, which read
I agree with Jonathan Doyle. No one cares. I mean your friends might like them but that doesn’t mean they care. Naturally the first comment on the post said “Are you serious?” Lol. This comment can be read however you want. My interpretation is that this person is a parent and is offended. Mainly because they don’t agree. Or if you’re thinking is like mine, you would say “are you serious? Oh dear. You’re right. Does anyone actually care?”
There are so many other reasons why I don’t show his full face on Instagram anymore. Apart from the obvious and worst possible reason mentioned above (which I don’t want to repeat), these are the other reasons:
- I want to protect him from negative things on social media. You cannot control what comment someone may say in response to your post. You’ve allowed them access to your photos so you have to bear the comments whether positive or negative.
- He has a right to grow up without being labelled by others and the possibility of cyber bullying. People easily hide behind their keyboards and say whatever they want because no one can stop them!
- Out of respect for my husband, who requested that I don’t advertise him to the world. At first, I was hesitant about his request. I thought, he doesn’t understand social media because he doesn’t have any accounts. Doesn’t he trust my judgement?
I had my profile set to public and wanted followers. I had him on almost every photo and wanted him to be famous because I believed he was camera perfect. He’s got charisma. He’s got swag. He’s smart. I asked myself – ‘But how can he be famous if my profile is private?’ Despite my beliefs – I trust my husband and now finally see why he wanted it this way. If my son was meant to be famous, that will come naturally. I should not groom him and put him out there without his permission. I may find out later when he starts high school, that he’s embarrassed by these photos. Which will only result in possible bullying and he may later hate me for showing the world his fave toys from when he was 4.
I’ve come to realise that life will take the course it is supposed to take but in the meantime, just be conscious of what your sharing.
Does everyone really need to know what you ate for breakfast? #FoodPorn
Do they really care that your son just graduated day care? #ProudMum
Who really wants to know what you’re wearing today? #OOTD
Or the colour of your undies? #TMI
Just remember that your actions have consequences. What you post now (e.g. A selfie at the beach when you’ve chucked a sickie from work) may some how come back to bite you in the butt. #JustSayin
– Godly –
19 June 2015